Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Sympathy for the Devil

Hi all. Sorry it's been a while since my last update.

Oh, what do you all care really.

Family news: The famous studio hasn't progressed at all. I have, in a typically Paddy-style loss of enthusiasm and instant change, been spending too much time on my other project. You can learn more on that by clicking on the kart racing link I have there on the right. Well, you have to admit, it is more fun than banging roofing nails into myself and risking dismemberment with power tools.

Naomi was halfway through a book but I told her to start again because it was starting to look too much like The Chronicles of Narnia meets Animal farm. Why can't she just enjoy being a kid?

Sam's reading and writing is coming along really well, although he still destroys things.

Becky is cute but never eats her dinner.

There, that's the family stuff over with. Now I can start raving.

I found out something disturbing today. The Greens, that association of secular pagan nature-worshipping humanists disguised as a political party, and their high priest Bob Brown, have finally done it. They have succeeded in lobbying the government to have
the DEVIL listed as a "vulnerable species" under the Environment Protection and Biodiversity Act.

As many of you know from my previous posts, and possibly consider our friendship to be teetering on the brink of disaster, I am a right-wing wacko Jesus nut. Therefore, I am constantly being hyper-sensitive to some of the inconsistencies in the way society treats Christians as compared to the treatment of, er, lets just say, "other religious demographics".

(translation: Muslims. Heh heh. No seriously, I don't just mean them. Or do I?? Note the tactic there of using my creativity to deceptively blur the lines between fact and fiction. Well it worked for Dan Brown)

So who's laughing now? My opinions are finally vindicated. An official political office, if you must refer to the Greens in that manner, have complained loud enough to have their master Satan himself recognised as some kind of unfairly-maligned entity. Nothing says hard-done-by, emotionally battered, poorly treated, like the word "vulnerable". Australians love the underdog, so now they must love Satan.

Beezelbob Brown, pictured yesterday. Disclaimer: horns, evil eyes and pitchfork may have been added for effect. Or not.

If ever you need more proof that antagonism towards Christianity is legitimised through political correctness, here it is. Remember, saying anything bad or critical about anyone who is still alive is politically incorrect. Well, that's how I understand it anyway. Let's have a brief look at the PC rules:
- You cannot criticise Mohamed, even though he's not alive.
- You can dump on Jesus and Catholics, that's okay. They have it coming. Besides, they're harmless and don't bite back
- Don't make movies showing Muslims as terrorists, that wouldn't be nice
- Always denounce terrorism but if a terrorist leader stops his twisted lunatics from killing people for five minutes, give him a Nobel Peace Prize
- Talented gay people are talented because they're gay
- Talented heterosexual people are just talented for some other reason.

Confused? So am I. But fear not. This very confusion is spin-doctored into something nice. "Diversity".

Take that so-called "Gospel of Judas" for example. It got 6pm news coverage. It was a TV star as breaking news at Easter time 2006 (even though it was first dug up in 1972). It was championed as yet another "missing gospel" that sheds "new light" on the life of JC. It provided further "proof" that the Biblical gospels are not the only ones.
Never mind that it's yet another meaningless pile of drivel written by third century weirdos with way too much spare time on their hands. Never mind that many of these so-called gospels are practically for sale on Ebay. Never mind that they lie about who wrote them. Never mind that the four biblical ones are the only ones that actually make any sense or can be historically verified. Oh no, this is one should be taken seriously. Why? Because it says Jesus was into all sorts of stuff, went astral travelling, believed in faires, and was quite possibly a bhuddist. It promotes "diversity".

Yep, it promotes diversity all right. It's so diverse it makes no actual sense at all. You can't get more diverse than that. The less it's got to say, the more diverse it is.
That's the whole idea. Don't believe in one thing, believe in everything. If you do, you're diverse. If you don't, you're a bigot. Geddit? Good.
Using this logic, one day archeologists will dig up the lyrics to Sympathy for the Devil and suggest they have found yet another "missing gospel".

Satan disguised as Elizabeth Hurley. Clever.

So, I suspect this obsession with diversity has lead to this political protection of the Prince of Darkness himself. He's on the "vulnerable" list now. An official reconciliation, if you will. "Welcome to the boys club, Satan me ol' chum, and sorry about all the exorcisms".

According to our own government, Beezelbub himself is just misunderstood. All those thousands of years of evil, manipulation, mass destruction, murder, deception were just his reaction to being unfairly ostracised. Poor Satan. He has feelings too, you know.

Just like poor old Shane Warne. When he made sexually obscene phone calls and mucked around with prostitutes, setting a superb example for Australia's kiddies and buggering his marriage, he was just being a "larrikin". Good ol' Shaney. Our Warney. One of the lads!

Mick Jagger was really on to something. He was trying to be tongue-in-cheek. Now Sympathy for the Devil is the Greens' anthem. Now it's actually happened. It's been legislated under the Environment Protection and Biodiversity Act. See what I mean? Bio-DIVERSITY.

And the "Environment" eh? I always knew nature-worshippers were all Satanists.

I can see it coming. Pastors all over Australia will be locked up for calling him "the enemy". Finally, they've found a law with which to shut up Fred Nile.

Oh wait... here's the headline again... "The Federal Government has formally listed the TASMANIAN devil as a vulnerable species..."


Now he can go on a killing spree

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